Get my Fancy Gloves!

Good Sunday Morning!

Humanling and I are listening to the new Depeche Mode as I have my coffee and she draws a picture. Depeche Mode is just one of those bands that no matter how good or bad the previous effort was, I have to follow and keep up with them. Korn fell off the list a long time ago unfortunately. NIN is another one, along with Linkin Park, Bjork and Tori Amos that I have to pick up the bread crumb trail for.

I think I am blogging right now to avoid cleaning the guinea pig cages. Something in my mind knows that I still have to do it but every moment I am not doing it is quite ok with me. Plus, no matter how clean I try to keep the cat boxes, one of them (Azrael mostly) deuces it and destroys square blockage of the neighborhood in the process. It doesn't help that I use "natural" cat litter....stuff made from corn with no toxins (unless of course it is probably GMO corn...I know ingesting it is not good but can you coat a turd in it without reprecussion?) Therefore it doesn't really coat scent well. We have gotten so used to not using the overperfumed and toxic cat litter though that even using a little bit to mix in with the corn litter is just too much dust and perfume for us.

I am attempting some container gardening this year. I try to walk my talk and so I'm really trying. The Farmer's Almanac online is my virtual leader. If they say plant beets today, I plant beets. If they say throw a dime onto the yellow line in the road to yield a better green bean, then they must be right. Right?

So far we've only just planted beets and carrots. I started training our squirrels to eat off the deck a few months ago. I used to feed them on the deck and they would always be there. We are on the 2nd floor so I've been throwing their food far from where ours will be and hopefully they will keep their affairs to the ground level.

On Friday at work I can't believe I did something so silly. When you were a kid, did you ever cry during a meal that had something like corn in it? Then during the hyperventilating part, inhale the item whole and start choking? Just trying to set this up here. I heated up my food at work in the toaster oven like I always do, and it's usually quite hot, hence - heating up the food. I put a spoonful of white beans in my mouth and they were so hot that I opened my mouth to suck in some air to cool them off and of course, inhaled a bean. I managed to chew and swallow the rest before busting out, red-faced and trying to be mute about it. However, no one is allowed to cough, sneeze or wince in my workplace without inquiry from the pod people around you. Through my tears and coughs I held up my drink "I'm alright!" to drive further looks and questioning away. During this whole thing, Capricorn had been emailing me back and forth about some enviro debate we were having. Me questioning him about his possible choice of buying a third vehicle when he already has a truck, a car or two and a motorcycle. He sits close enough to me to usually let me know he can hear me laughing, etc. and then I get an email from him during all the coughing and its sticking to the topic as if nothing is going on. Not that I wanted him to ask but its just too obvious. Like if he was on fire and I went over and asked him if he can help me fix the copier. I thought it was rather funny, like perhaps he might win the debate if I were getting the Heimlich and couldn't email back right away.

And yet still, my distraction during the episode continues. I was also laughing in the middle of choking as I thought of a story that El told me once. He was on the subway and was I believe, facing someone's side with the way the seats are on some trains. He choked on his coffee and sprayed it all over the person and coughed throughout at least 15 minutes of the ride. He says the person got up and moved. I'd be so grossed out to be spattered on by a stranger in NYC.

So the thought made me just laugh and cough and laugh and cough. It makes me think to myself that I hope when I leave this planet, my last thought is funny.

Capricorn does not know I am getting married yet as whenever in the past I have given him news of a marriage or new boyfriend, his opinion is always the same - it won't work out unless it is with him. I'm not eager to hear a rehash of his opinion this time so who knows when I will drop the M bomb on him.

Speaking of my cool M bomb, I have heard from my fiance's brother on Facebook which is SO cool. My new family lives in another hemisphere so I'm sure it might be like discovering a new species for both sides. I am planning to write to his mother this weekend (maybe it will even keep me from doing the crap boxes even longer) but probably will try to use a translation site since they speak Portugese.

On Show related news - Stacy from www.SafeCosmetics.org was quite an excellent guest and left us with a very useful tool to check out what's in your name brand products and how toxic they might really be. This week's guest is going to be Sherrie Brooks Vinton, author of "Real Food Revivial" which is a kick ass book. I always think I know a little something and there is always so much more to learn! She is going to address all sorts of angles regarding the food we eat, including GMOs, labelling, factory farming, etc. She is quite the wealth of knowledge and if I didn't want to know anything about it so that I could continue to eat and supply the machine with my money and my body, I wouldn't be able to read this book. So join us on Wednesday, May 20th at 5:30pm. If you can't make it, that's fine. We're archived, baby!!! You can always find us and our shows at www.blogtalkradio.com/scorpion-equinox-. They're good to listen to during work or to download for your walk, your work out time, etc. And we have a good beat!

Well I am certain that the noxious fumes have amped since I've been writing so it is time to dutifully attend to my furry children.

x0x0x0x

Playing Craps

So yeah that whole gotta eat better thing....I'll start later today. Or tomorrow. And put that on a loop. I've got to keep the end result in mind...a nice clean ultrasound with no evidence of said fibroid. The tech and I will be all "Say whaaa? There's nothing here!" I'll keep telling myself that as I PMS my way through my sensitivities, face flushing with the croissant I'm having for breakfast today. I couldn't be anymore beautiful unless I were part of a tribal nation where the warpaint is on for battle.

Humanling and I went to Borders and I was very good and didn't buy any junk to eat, mostly because she was sitting there and would call me out on it. I did get a coffee though, which had a shot of hazelnut in it. And by "shot" I mean most likely one fourth of it because it tasted severely off and did not satisfy the afternoon coffee craving. It's currently abandoned, in the cup holder in the car, waiting to be dumped out on the road (I'm parked on the road) so that someone's tire can track it down a few feet, Hazel style.

As I sat there with my coffee at Borders, I suddenly realized - Hey! What happened to the inspiration of the girl with the teapot the other day? She was nowhere in sight so instead I became comfortable with my skin having a revolt over more bad stuff.

Until I had a chance to shower, I felt like there was a dirty zoo all over me. Between yesterday and today its been nothing but cleaning piggie cages, litter boxes and the poor hermit crabs - they are done every so often - months and months go between. I finally gave them some nice purple sand today. They really perk up when the tank is done. We also gave both guinea's a bath in a used baby bathtub that we purchased today. One of them was so so about it and the other one caused a universal no no and pooped in the tub. Twice. The acoustics in the bathroom do not comfortably accompany a loud and long "Ewwwwwwwwww" by the duo of Humanling and I.

That's Azrael up there with Kyyo. Despite the ominous and maximum evil staredown in this photo, Az is really the best cat I've ever known. She hasn't promised not to eat my little boys but she doesn't mind posing with them.

El is taking the train in tonight so that we can celebrate Mama's Day tomorrow. Wow, this should be really nice. Last year after visiting me own mere, I was alone for the day with Humanling and we went to the park. It feels nice to do this with someone else now.

The weather is gorgeously gray and humid. I'm not huge on high humidity but my hair really soaks it in after a washing. I like this since usually it walks around pretending to be a starving mane, thin, limp and more straight. Straight outta the shower in this weather, its all precursor to Slash. Humanling's dad has the wavy hair too so I have to wonder when her hair is going to abandon the straight and narrow.

Time to enjoy hanging with the Ling. Happy Mother's Day to all of you!

Happy Belated Beltane!

Hello everyone - everytime I'm away from the Bloggersphere I miss you guys terribly. And yet at night, I've mostly been able to get away from the computer by 9:30-10pm. I try to minimize exposure since I work on one all day long. That and sometimes I just feel dull AND scattered. So that's no fun for anyone around me - scattering dullness hither and thither!

I am pre-caffeine at the moment but am ok with that. There is Irish jig music playing in the kitchen to keep the running dishwasher and boiling eggs company. The Electric Company show is playing in here. I'm too lazy to shut one of them off. Or maybe I'd rather write while the moment is lending itself in this way.

The radio show is going wonderfully for us and it does take extra time to work on - probably another reason (ha ha...a BIG reason) why I haven't blogged in so long! Upcoming on our show is a man who's son was murdered in an act of gang violence (his son was not in a gang, he was a pizza delivery boy). Azim Khamisa reached out to his son's 14 year old killer and realized there were victims on both sides of the gun. This man is amazing. He has built a foundation in his son's honor and did what many people think they cannot do. He took his son's death and turned it around to an act of forgiveness so huge - many of us probably have no idea what that feels like. Anyway, if you're interested, he will be on with us this week.

We are excited, it seems we have Martha Stewart's holistic vet, Dr. Shawn coming onto our show (Alan hurry and get a cat!), along with Sherrie Brooks Vinton who wrote Real Food Revival. We'll be having a show on apartment gardening and have tentatively scheduled someone on to discuss the disappearance of the bees. We're not totally sure if she can make it yet as the time difference is huge (she is in England). And of course, I have to mention again, I love Bruce Lipton, he will be on in October.

At the start of this post, the Humanling walked over to me and mentioned that she found a new loose tooth. Before I got to the last paragraph, I was poked on the shoulder so that I could see the bloody tooth, now in her hand. She's so funny. Just couldn't leave it in there. Well I guess this shows me a spot of her determination. And I can be rest assured that her fingers will not be in her mouth out in public, wriggling germs all over it.

Kyyo and Yuki have their two different cages and are beautiful little boys. Very different personalities as Yuki is rambunctious and fearless (except when Kyyo is put with him).

Azrael and Princess are chasing each other through the house from time to time now and I do catch them sleeping on my bed close to each other but not cuddling. Azrael had a pissfest last week when Humanling took out the bubbles and started blowing them. Princess just looked so absolutely adorable swatting them with her little Persian paw. We never see this side of her. Azrael eventually had it up to *here* with the cuteness and pounced on her.

Humanling's dad is in a spot of trouble for sure. He has been charged with assault in the first degree. He gave me the story and it sounds as though it was self-defense for a friend but I am told by someone else that he has very little chance of getting out of this. Apparently, outside of a bar some Iraq vets and Cavey's friend (we'll call him Scott Fargus), Scott were in an ugly verbiage. Cavey basically said to Scott, Come on, let's just go home. But then the Vets called them "old" and really, Scott can't back down ever. Never does. Problems ensued, Scott was held down and repeatedly tasered in the Hoo Hahs and Cavey had no choice but to do whatever it was that he had to in order to stop it. The next step was advanced violence on Cavey's part to get the guys off Scott and apparently Cavey is the only one who was arrested. He came to my house, drink in hand. When I say drink. I mean like an open glass that you would walk around your house with or what your friend's mom gave you when you visited. A drinking glass. It had an orange soda and alcohol in it. I don't know who drove him or allowed it in the car, but he got here and sobbed when he got to the part of what he had done. It's possible that he will be gone for quite some time but we'll have to see because somehow that guy is greased and slips out of many things.

And now, for a nice bit of happening. Today is May 2nd, that day 13 years ago that I fell completely for a guy and we'd never been able to fully make it work, no matter how good it felt. Much of it I believe is my own issue but at the same time, I don't believe where we are now is possible without any of it. But with time and determination and genuine feelings, we've decided its time to make it all worthwhile. I'm a-changing his name on here too. It used to be :doot: but now it's gonna be El. El as in L as in Lobster. We're getting married this summer in NYC! We're looking at July 25th right now as the date. His mom will be here from Brazil and I think she's never been here before. He also hasn't seen his family in over a decade so we coincided the wedding with the visit.

So now we are getting things together for this July and it isn't a whole lot of time, but its time enough. A good Virgo & Scorpio team we are and this is our first working project!

My mom would love us to do it in CT but she just is paranoid of getting lost in Manhattan. The woman grew up in Brooklyn. But I can understand her fear. We're pretty sure everyone will get there juuuuust fine.

So Alan, I might be in the neighborhood more than I was. We were down there, Humanling and I a couple of weeks ago. Humanling had a seizure though (probably out of too much sun exposure and excitement and lack of sleep) the morning of going down (but she is fine when its over and her day is to continue as usual unless she's really tired) and then on the train ride back when I went to wake her to get off the train. Humanling's seizures are always upon waking when they occur. I've been lucky to be a part of some good yahoo groups and am learning from another person or two's experience. For this train trip I had some very very nice young guys carry Humanling off during the tail end of the seizure because that was our stop and I had our bags too.

Epilepsy is a tricky thing. Very delicate to handle sometimes. And when things are going well for months with no seizures, I slip into a comfort zone and that's when it will happen again. She always needs enough sleep, not too much sun or excitement and high protein/fat, lower carbs it seems. It's all trial and error. But I'm grateful that it is what it is. I've heard horror stories from other parents and I will take our hand, thank you.

It does indeed feel like coffee time now. I must get the homestead cleaned up for the date with my Virgoian fiance later to celebrate a whole new world that opened up 13 years ago.

A big hug for everyone and I hope you all have a beautiful and inspiring weekend!

x0x0

Even Though I Might Be the Only One Who Cares...

I had a FABULOUS day so far today. I am off work, the kid is in school/Girl Scouts/wandering around town looking for a familar face.

More posting on the fabulous day later.

I know this is going to seem really trivial.

I was driving home from Borders (Heaven) and suddenly saw in the other lane, a freshly hit squirrel. It happens. All the time.

This one was trying like hell to get away from the road. But it couldn't. It's head was smashed and stuck to the road. It was trying though. It's back legs were pushing to move the rest of the body in a frenzy. But it wasn't happening.

My soul was bruised. No crying, no screaming, just a very black spot dotted and spread like grease on a paper towel. Perhaps this is my drama spot. I'm usually devoid of the D word. I can't stand mine or anyone else's.

All I could think of .... how horrible must that be. To lie there in fear when the morning started off in darting around for sustenance to put away for another day. I wonder which animal will find his stash.

What could I have done? Stopped the car and pushed him out of the road with a stick? He would have been hit before I could park. Another car was already on its way as I passed.

I am usually quite an observant driver. The left front panel on my car suggests something entirely different but when it comes to animals and not cement poles, I try very hard to keep my reflexes alert and speed under control.

Especially after the time in my early 20s when I cruised through a red light and was pulled over. The officer needed a reason as to why I did it.

Because if I tried to stop I would have skidded through it.

That was not a good defense, as I was to learn 4 seconds later because In THAT case, the officer pointed out that I was speeding as well.

What am I trying to say here without being offensive? Let's try not to put other beings in misery. (To which some people will say, FABULOUS! Completely run it over and kill it instead of a partial death!). I don't really know how to avoid these things. I can say that really, I've hit only one animal since 1987 and couldn't find it on the road upon pulling over. I'm guessing it ran away.

Oh and there was a deer who jumped out of the woods into my car once but I was in traffic so only going about 10 mph. And I have a Saturn. He left no dents.

So for the sake of not having that particular burned image of living hell in your mind (unless you have your own, I know I'm not the only one), or having your children see it out of the car window...get your pilot's permit. Or just drive mindfully.

Seriously though. It sucked.

My Soulmate, Derek Wheeter

Laugh all you want. This is Mr. Man. He is my Soulmate.

Alan, I know you love squishy faced Death Eater Azrael, but she's got nothin on this little guy.

At one point, I thought about putting a black bar over his eyes for privacy purposes. I've invested a lot of cash in him and can't be having people busting into my house (except for Organic friend because she leaves nice presents and well, she's just the recipient of my life, unfiltered - and NO ONE needs that job) and stealing him.

Oh CRAZY you say? PLEASE! Look at his handsome mug. :doot: is damn lucky that I respect the boundaries between me and Mr. Man and that we are not to be in That Way. Azrael is just lucky I don't kick her ass out the door.

We've only known each other since about January of this year and I am his second human slave. I was told he is about four years old. And because you are dying to know, he hates tomatoes. Today, I've added White Nectarines to the Do Not Want list.

Once, I went on a Match.com date. The guy was nice, not for me, a little too looking behind him constantly and forthright but serious, about his OCD. My OCD is funny. Not so much to me, but like I've mentioned, if no one is laughing, then my fears have been verified and life is Not Okay.

And okay, when I asked him about his mom, he said she died in the last year or so, then I asked about his sister and she died too of drugs and so I figured I'd better not ask anymore questions. However, he did something that I won't forget. When I showed up and gave him a hug that might have been categorized as an Air Hug, he handed me a flower, and then a baggie stuffed with goodies for Mr. Man. He'd cut fresh apples, threw in some lettuce and cucumbers. It was the thought behind that. Either that or he knew about Mr. Man's extreme power over me and was trying to do away with him and have me all to himself....(breath, breath, pant.....gasp....ok...calm....perish the thought.)

Turns out the goods were legit. Mr. Man ate them. Or else he is Rasputin.

Now that you've all seen him, I must go buy him an ankle tracker. Just in case.