Sorta by The Hair of my Chinny Chin Chin

Humanling is out tonight on a date with a fellow goat.

My ex who has given me a lifeline this Christmas time, is a Capricorn. As is my little Manager. They are a day apart in fact. The two of them could ruin a good party with all their knowledge of centimeters, financial spreadsheets and Lists of Rules.

But I like being around both of them. Most of the time.

The Goat and I dated years ago when Cougars started to become as famous as the outing of Bigger Butts. There's a decade difference between us but he has always seemed like the older one. Or he used to. Now Humanling does. I'm the goofy irregular compared to those two. They would file me under their category Unamused, I'm sure.

We broke up, yada yada...but still had to work together. So through the march of the dumping of Here's Your Stuff on top of his desk, the two of us dating other people, my marriage's beginning and ending (he warned me - but who would listen to an ex at a time like that?) and a bunch of non productive meetings, we're still talking, hanging out at times. And I'm still being exposed as a klutzy and sometimes hasty snarf. If I'm going to trip over my own feet, his eyes catch it. If I'm going to spill coffee while walking, he points it out to me. I point out to him that the pattern and color of our office carpeting was meant for exactly this purpose.

He's the one I rebelled against the hardest. Because he had a plan, because he always thought his way was the most efficient, because he said so. I would walk off cliffs when he'd argue with me that the opposite direction was clearly the most sensible just to show him that I'm older and that I somehow survived thirty something years without him. I may have paid for many of those decisions but I made my point. You can't tame me with your lists. You can't harness my ways by showing me my perceived mistakes and your Intro to Your Better Way of Doing It Next Time Starting Now. And when you do have me tied up and ready, it's only because I LET you.

Yet he likes being around me.

We both sense a challenge.

Why did we break up years ago? Because of a million small reasons that morphed into the reason that I told him - he's ten years younger than me. If he wanted children, he'd have to act immediately or forever hold his peace (at that time). I couldn't risk being with someone to have them eventually decide that they wanted a family and have them leave me in a broken hearted situation.....just like the one that I was left in anyway....by a guy with a bigger age difference than the Goat.

Only the Goat is way more reliable. Which is why when he asked to take out Humanling for an hour or so tonight, I had to say yes. A decent male who I know won't say or do anything weird to my precious blog of protoplasm, and who will not only show up, but show up on time. Humanling is very anal about time. If you dare to give her any resembling an exact plan, like a time, date or plan, she expects delivery. Then you receive one of two hells - her countdown to the event OR the meltdown when someone like Cavey doesn't deliver.

I warned Goat today that he is spending time with a little girl who isn't around men very much. I don't know how she views them. I don't know what she thinks of them. She clings to them and at the same time she gets tired of their presence after a few hours, including the Infallable Cavey. She likes her mommy time.

I read once about eight years ago that a Capricorn child and Scorpio parent are in danger of creating their own world in which no one can really enter but them. I have found that to be true in our case. But she chose a parent with hermit tendencies and wildly foraged OCD. So it happens.

The Goat and I are friends now, who trade some really nice energies here and there. We are nothing alike. So no bets, no expectations and no dates longer than a few hours. Thankfully he knows me well enough. Just by saying hi to me in the past he's been greeted with "I can't date right now! I need to be alone! I need to figure myself out!" Thankfully that's one less person I have to tell the story to. He gets it.