Doctor Visit for a half hour vs Helicopter Mother's Observation

I would so laugh at the term "Helicopter Mom" if I wasn't one. However I do think that mine is out of necessity of my beautiful Humanling, who has had seizures upon waking up from sleep and has jellybean jar full of food sensitivities, along with sun sensitivity, noise sensitivity and just all around Feelings Sensitivity.



Her first major seizure happened in August of 2008 and jolted me into finally taking her food sensitivities without the grain of salt. The day before the seizure, she'd indulged in nothing but all of them and multiple times. It had been quite the gluttonous summer Friday for us. We haven't had one since. We used to stop out on Friday nights, order ourselves the vegetarian version of junk food through a McDonald's drive up window. A cheeseburger, no cheese, extra onion and pickle. We felt like "normal" people who can enjoy that sort of mainstream junk stop. After that we would head to Borders for a drink that involved a lot of milk and whipped cream and sugar. Or maybe ice cream. Or maybe have pizza, full of gluten, dairy and tomatoes (one of the many nemeses for Humanling). I reasoned that it was 'once in a while' and it was 'ok to cheat'. Until her seizure that woke me out of my sleep. I thought she was kidding, and quickly my sleepy brain realized that this was exactly what I knew was possible but never thought would actually happen.

She is on two black box medications and going into puberty within the next few years. Her risk of suicide and depression being amped even one percent is jarring. She's had six seizures since August of 2008 and although it is scary and not something that I celebrate, I do celebrate that it has only been six, and not anything worse at this point.

We had to fill out standard forms for next year's school, for summer camp, etc. Her neurologist wanted a visit before filling forms out. So we did the visit that I knew would be a guilt session. I am no expert on epilepsy, but I am really good at knowing things about my daughter. I was made to feel guilty that we hadn't visited in so long. However, I knew any visits would only involve medication increases. I know that forums on the internet do not substitute for medical knowledge, but I have learned how very individual people are with this affliction. How food, sunlight, fat, protein, vitamins, herbs, emotions, hormones, can all play a part in what happens with the body. I brought this up to the neuro who stated rather curtly that food sensitivity effects on seizures "haven't been proven". Nor any other part of the diet or environment. I stated that food sensitivity is a stressor on the body and stress of any kind can produce a seizure.

She told me that two of the seizures that I saw weren't seizures. One not being possible because Humanling spoke through it. She called that one a "movement disorder". The other seizure she termed a "fainting spell" even though the child never fell, never passed out.

Then she said it was time to do a sleep deprivation EEG. This means that my child would be forced to stay awake for about 24 hours in the hopes of stressing her body enough to make her go into seizures so that she can be studied. I felt my tears about to let the dam loose and looked down, "taking notes" in order to compose myself. I finally said 'No. I'm not comfortable with that." Her neuro then reminded me that we'd have to do the simple EEG that we do every year, seeing as I'm "not comfortable". Then she stated that I am awfully calm for a parent who's child has had six seizures. I replied that anything else wouldn't be helpful.

I left there in a silent fury with a radio show to do in the next hour. Thank God for good friends and a good partner. And of course, the power of creativity since the show helped me to diffuse without going near the subject.

So I am currently on the Google path for a holistic neurologist who will hopefully take insurance. If not, then I will have to see what I can do. I want a doctor who will help me take my child off these medications and help us in another way. Humanling has been on these medications for years and I have to wonder two things - did her seizures get worse because she needs them raised? Or did they get worse because she's on them at all? Her meds were raised after the first big seizure. They didn't stop the next five.

I'm not trying to say that doctor's don't know anything. They do, but an integrative approach can at least be welcomed. She doesn't seem to believe in it.

I want to see my child feel normal and be able to process her emotions more like a person not on medication. I feel like a huge hypocrite who megaphones "natural health" everywhere and then spoon pharmaceuticals down my kid's throat twice a day.

A lifetime really needs to be at least 250 years. Imagine how much more we could learn and integrate if that were true!